"Codename: Viper", NES, 1990.

This is an uninteresting ad for an uninteresting game. But the circumstances of the ad can make it interesting even if the end result is a yawn! To wit -- why is this basically the same ad template that Bionic Commando received? (Bionic Commando actually had two ads -- as we've seen here, the other one shared a layout with ads for Willow, and MegaMan 2 and Strider. None of these games enjoyed an ad layout unique to itself, but Bionic Commando is unique in that it was advertised using two different generic Capcom advertising templates!)

Code Name: Viper
You're The Drug Lord's
Worst Nightmare!
Your commander has instructed you to destroy a powerful drug cartel in South America, free innocent hostages, and bring in the murderous Drug Lord. No Sweat, Right?
Within minutes of landing in the South American Jungle, you've infiltrated the drug cartel's bases. Dodging bullets, you stumble into a hidden door to find better fire-arms and ammo. Hostages, too. Things are lookin' up!
You must now locate your fellow agent and collect the explosives you'll need to finish your mission -- and the murderous Drug Lord.

• Power Jumping: A great skill when you need to dodge bullets or mount sneak attacks.
• Hidden Doors: Behind them, find hostages, additional weapons and ammunition.
• Secret Communique: As you advance through the 8 levels, you'll uncover the message -- and the dreaded Drug Lord.
• Bombs: Handed off by a fellow agent, use these to escape to a more challenging level.
• Spectacular Graphics: Sensational graphics make South America's dangers come alive!

The game may not be forgettable but the ad copy sure is! I have lots of practice in the gentle art of coming up with something to say, and even I'm dangling here -- not only is it a lousy ad, but it's an uninterestingly lousy ad, a cardinal sin for this blog. So let's skip the analysis and get right to the ad comparison. (Hope this animation works!)

(Way to auto-quash animated .GIFs, Blogger! You stink!)