Friday, February 15, 2013

"DooM", SNES, 1995.

The game that needs no marketing, id software's Doom. (Why no marketing needed? First off, its existence was news enough -- I came of age in a time when people excitedly downloaded tech demos of the 3D levels without interactive opponents just to see (as prop-giving demogroups appreciated) what kind of unprecedented performance it was possible to milk out of PC architecture -- and second, because it was a brilliant success of a pre-freemium era where a solid, substantial and self-contained chunk of the content was given away for free as promotion for the commercially-available rest of it.)
Doom.  Super NES.  22 levels.  All the original monsters and weapons.  Plus the new FX chip.  So strap on your ammo and start spitting lead because the only thing that sucks worse than the pay are the odds.  DooM
More surprising than the existence of the ad (the product was notorious and ubiquitous across the PC landscape, but admittedly its presence on a home console would have been unexpected and warranted some small horn-tooting) is that it doesn't boast any screenshots to demonstrate its technological dominance or note-perfect '90s mood of gritty nihilistic horror-SF. But this image is a good one, especially given the varied kinds of black ant types surrounding "you".

Not much to say about the ad copy. Yes, that is how "understand?" is spelled in Italian, heard in all sorts of movies but rarely seen in print; the FX chip isn't that exciting if all it does is allow you to enjoy a castrated version of the computer experience. The bit about the pay sucking is good, but seems transplanted from a different ad that does more talking from an in-game perspective... nothing in this one had ever led me to contemplate Doomguy's salary.

(I found this ad in one comic, scanned it, saved it over the wireless network to my netbook, but the save failed and I didn't discover until well after the comic had already left my custody... so I looked up another copy of the ad someone else scanned online and ganked it. Full disclosure.)


  1. I think this might have been my request, to post ads for games that really don't need ads?

    1. Here's the thing: games that don't need ads usually don't get ads of their own, just parasite ads -- Donkey Kong? Buy the Donkey Kong teddy bear! Our license is already so famous, spending money popularizing it would just be throwing money away! And YOU can throw YOUR money away on this delightful stuffed animal.

  2. Funny you should mention the topic of 'pay' as my brother and I had ongoing conversations about how "killing these demon hordes was his job" vs. "no it wasn't, he was just some unlucky marine zapped into hell".

    Transcribed premise here suggests we were both sort of right!